Who Am I Actually Writing to?

Recently I was listening to a message by Pastor I love. He is so humble and so real. To me that is the perfect combination.

He often says in his sermons that he is preaching to himself as much as to his congregation. As I listened to his totally transparent message the other day, I realized I needed to follow his example.

When I started this website, my goal was to encourage others through my story. While that is still one of my main objectives, I realized there was another huge byproduct of this ministry that I wasn’t expecting.

I had no idea that I would be so encouraged!

I have been surprised to experience some pretty intense feelings while writing some of the posts. Things that I thought were healed suddenly cropped back up.

Healing that I thought was complete, had holes in it that I was unaware of. Encouragement that I needed stared me back in face from the screen. What was intended to bless others, has turned right around and touched me in ways and places that I didn’t know needed it.

I’ve seen this in other experiences as well. Whenever I recall Bible verses that I have taught to my kids, I smile. First of all because I am singing them and second of all because I intended to teach them but I think I am the one who learned the most.

I have done a lot of teaching in my life, and in many different capacities. I remember so much of the information even though some of the subjects I have not taught in over a decade. My experience is that when I am teaching and sharing, I am growing and learning. I am the one being put back together.

When I share something with a struggling friend, it’s often what I need to hear myself. When I point out my husband’s shortcomings, it usually means that I am doing the same thing in some form or another.

You see I used to think the teachers and preachers had it all together. They taught everyone else because they were so perfect. Over the years as I have done a lot of teaching and sharing with others, I realize more and more just how much I am learning, relearning and healing.

I started this blog to share my healing journey to encourage others. To share where and how God has turned my holes into wholeness. However, I don’t believe that I will enjoy complete wholeness on this earth. I have to wait for that.

Until then, I keep showing up the best I can hopefully spreading light to others. Thanks for being my people. Thanks for showing up for me, listening and creating a space for more of my holes to be converted to wholeness.